Coming back from a little time for myself...

Hello, everyone,

I have to apologize for being so absent this last month or so. I've been on a bit of a solitude mission. I haven't been writing on my blogs because I've been taking time to myself to deal with the month of March, as it was a full month. March 1st was my moms birthday. It would have been her 70th. And March 30th was the one year anniversary of her death.

I spent this time away just taking pictures and doing some other things with other hobbies that have been a little more introspective giving me time to be alone with my thoughts and feelings and giving me the time to not have to think of the right things to say or do. I did, however, write another article for Tiny Buddha back in February reflecting upon my relationship with my mother and my family, and that will be published soon. I will share that link with you as soon as it is available. (Update: Just click here for the full post at Tiny Buddha (dot) com, and thanks for visiting the site!)

I know it is still important to share myself with you, even, or maybe especially, in times of distress, but I also know it was important to do what I needed to do. My message to you, the lesson I learned, was that it's okay to take a break from things. You don't have to do everything at once. You don't have to strive to please everyone all the time. If you are at peace with what you are doing, it will show and the people around you will understand. Just as when you are miserable, that shows on your outside, as well.

Of course, I was worried that I wasn't holding up my "end of the bargain" and giving all that I have in my two blogs. Disappearing without any explanation is rude. But sometimes we can't please everyone all of the time. We have to do something that is best for ourselves, at times.

And that is perfectly okay. Don't judge yourself. Be kind and gentle with yourself and everything will come out exactly as it should.

The time that I took for myself to get things kind of organized in my mind and in my house and with my feelings helped me to get prepared for the difficult weeks that I had to face. Even though it has been a year since I lost her, I still miss my mom so much it seems impossible to bear. None of us can believe it has been a year, already. And in June, my husband and his grandmother will start to go through their mourning process for his mother all over again, as well.

I know now that I am able to take the time to reflect on what I needed to and I accomplished a lot in that time that I took that I wasn't racking my brain trying to do too many things at once. If you give yourself the opportunity, you will always find something new to worry about.

So, practice not giving in to those opportunities. Again, be kind to yourself. Be gentle with yourself, and know that you are doing things perfectly as they should be done. Know that you are perfect just the way that you are and you'll be guided perfectly by your highest self, all you have to do is just quiet yourself and listen for it.

I realize for some, even this causes a bit of anxiety. Fear that you may not be 'doing it right'. You may think, "How do I hear it? What do I do to hear it? How can I even listen for it?"

You can learn from others how to calm and center yourself to receive the wisdom that is rightfully yours. There is a wealth of information out there from like minded people who are all seeking the same peace that you are. There are online forums, books, blogs...but most of all, you just have to believe that you hold everything inside you that you need to figure it all out.

You just have to believe in yourself, for inside you, you will find that which you call God, whatever that may, or may not, be for you. The Universe created you to be perfect and that is what you need to believe that you are. You are not a mistake and you are worth being treated well. By others. By yourself.

Wishing you all the wonderfulness you deserve,

Nanette